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I Was Just Wondering…

October 24, 2012

Why do you need to make my gym experience worse than the worsest thing about gyms to begin with, going.

Caution: Contents Hot!

But I went. I made myself. I sacrificed an episode of Dollhouse to go. And the audacity of those stranger girls taking up two of the TWO Cybex machines. How dare you. How daaaare you.

I just recently discovered the amazingness that is this machine. And of course, the one thing I jones for in the most annoying time slot of my day, is in minimal supply. Add getting off work later now- BAM. You have a grumbling gym goer Elipticalling aggressively behind two strangers as they Cybex innocently, my murderous rage unbeknownst to them. And then, a miracle happens- one girl gets off. She’s done. YAY! CELEBRATE! Turn that mumbling, maniacal frown upside down! And then, a miracle evaporates- in my moment of pause, the exerciser next to me jumps off her Elliptical and shimmies into the empty Cybex. You. Bitch.

Dramatization.

To make matters worse, SHE DIDN”T EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE IT! She ended up looking like a walking stilt-man with one stilt a good inch shorter.

I left the gym. I couldn’t be a part of it anymore. I needed an ice green tea.

Discontinue use if rash develops.

I was just wondering…If i’m this aggressive about gym equipment, what would I be like with something that really mattered?

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