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News! WORTH! Newsing!

September 6, 2012

Of which there is nothing!

Weridos, I’ve perused HuffPost for an hour and thanks to all this Presidential schtuff (of which I won’t touch with a ten foot pole) the other articles are lacking. And by lacking I mean, HuffPost scrapped the barrel of their “journalists” for todays array of stories. It’s seriously brutal.

I started out with a story on bullying, but I couldn’t make that funny bc I have a thing called a heart. And the story was awfully sad. When boys pick on a girl and wrap her in plastic wrap at a bus stop- You’re only showing the world how small your penis is and that you’ll never amount to anything. Your parents should be proud.

I moved on to a tag line that was rather shocking: 10 Classics That Prove Reading Is Bullshit. Someone who has penned himself a comedian and author claims reading is bullshit and that’s not what life is about.  On his list of examples? Fahrenheit 451, Ulysses, On The Road, and gives a few quips on Ayn Rand though he doesn’t mention any of her books by name. While I shouldn’t be giving his article the time of day, even in this sense, I just had to say something. I was never one for classics as they’re shoved down your throat when you’re way too young to really understand, so I could have laughed about this if it were written by an actual 15 year old, but alas, it’s penned by a 15 year old trapped in man’s body.

THEN I came across an article about a man who almost died and how he sees life now….I think it was written by a man who thinks he almost died but is really just senile because that article is like a 50 year old’s version of Catcher in the Rye minus the nun.

THEEEEEEN I came across a post on how a room’s set up can aid or disrupt sleep- well that’s dahgone interesting! Only…it was all basic stuff that didn’t need an articles space. Light is bad, have a comforter that breathes, NO TV! Wa wa, blah blah.

So….There is no news worth newsing…I’m kinda weirded out about it, I guess this politics stuff IS important….*unconvinced stare*

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