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Hair Did That Happen?

August 7, 2012

Alright, look. I’m not normally one to call out sexist double standards, and this isn’t calling out as much as it is…more of uh….WTF?

When women in Hollywood have a little nippytucky it’s advertised on the grocery news stand like today’s weather report. When women in the shows Frankie and I watch turn up with a touch of something facially different, we spend minutes trying to peg the exact surgical change.

But I watched a whole season of Housewives of Some Place In America and didn’t notice one wife’s husband had a chin implant- I had to be told. Which in all honesty, probably isn’t the best example when one normally assumes noses, lifts and  bubbies in looking for work done. But hairlines….

We can’t ignore this, nobody doesn’t NOT notice this- and yes, a double negative was needed here.

What the hell is the magical procedure that is  growing the hairline of famous brunette men? And Theresa Guidice.

I don’t care that they’ve found the life elixir of hairlines, I just care that women are called out without a blink when their foreheads don’t move- but when a hairline not only moves, but relocates about an inch down, we just whistle and look the other way.

But YMWIK, are you sure it moved that much? Maybe they just comb it differently?

I don’t know…. maybe they do comb it differ-ARE YOU SERIOUS? LOOK AT THAT!

But while we do turn the other balding temple for these fellas, I will be the first to say- You don’t get the credit, acting dudes.

Hollywood has been moving hairlines before you could tell what the hair color even was:

Yeah, that’s Rita Hayworth. And Rita Hayworth aka Margarita Carmen Cansino.

Notice the Original Guidice Hairline for Ms. Casino…. and the lighter skinned Casino with the Hayworth Hairline moved up almost a full inch.

I will admit that Rita was not part of my original schpeel, when researching actors and their suddenly appearing hair, this old Hollywood gem was dropped in my lap. And I also found a nice lil valuable lesson that nobody will ever be able to take to heart:

The “Business” has been reworking the appearance of their employees since moving pictures brought in 10cents a flick. Once the genius elites of Hollywood understood the appeal of beautiful people to average folk, they would stop at nothing to ensure their looks were as topnotch as the talent.

Meaning? We have to stop comparing ourselves to this lucky lot of entertainers that media has deemed far more important than your own self. We simply can’t live up to the multimillion dollar enterprise that is cutting, tucking, lifting, shifting, and shaping those we absorb for hours through dead eyes.

And hey, on the bright side, most of us don’t need to have our hairlines moved. 

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