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Hemingway Definitely Had This Convo.

June 20, 2012

I’m publishing my first book on Kindle. I’ve luckily made a wonderful friend that I’ve held tightly in my grasp since my first years here in the hellhole of New York. Ignore the chain that runs from her wrist to the leg of her desk, she likes it. She also takes on editing my books, approving blog ideas, does my graphics… gets me drunk. AND SHE LIKES IT.

Please enjoy our conversation on my upcoming success:

Me: i’m eventually going to have to pay you for this nonsense….i hope you accept retro pay. you’re going to get so many shout outs in my books that eventually i’ll just have to put your name on the front cover.

Maki: well lets just see first if i can even figure this out hahahhaah

Me: And royalties, I’ll give you those.

Maki: yeah just make sure your publisher pays me for my design work.

Me: psssssh, the day i get that deal I’ll say: great, now I’ll put you in contact with my designer- I don’t need one from here. K BYE THANKS FOR ALL MY MONEY!!!!

Maki: hahahHHAHAHAHA

Me: that’s how i see that going, i feel its pretty close to accurate

Maki: pretty much

Me: or I’ll need you to talk for me seeing that I can’t even put my own foot down for money i need

Maki: LOL, i’ll be your agent/designer

Me: manager/designer/friend/lawyer/kneecap buster/etc

Maki: wow

Me: you’ve earned it, Maki

Maki: i will need a business card that like, expands

Me: luckily you’re a designer

Maki: HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

Me: so you can make that happen

Maki: LOLOL, truth

Me: sometimes i watch Bethenny Frankle clinking glasses in celebration of her cocktails going global, or her book going number one and I think: when will i have my epic restaurant scene where we clink glasses and laugh nervously bc my life is changing drastically

Maki: HAHAHAHHAHA and obviously the glasses will have skinny girl in them

Me: yes, that will be ironic part or the part i tear up about..and drunkingly acknowledge but only you’ll know what I’m saying. and my publisher will be second guessing her relationship with me and then i’ll tell her to shut up but she’ll say, i didn’t say anything.  and I’ll be all, oh sorry I was living in a memory of me typing this situation out to my designer and felt i should stick with the script……. and you’ll kick me from under the table and take my skinny girl glass

Maki: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

So pretty much what I’m saying is: Kindle me some time 🙂 You can check out my blog here ! I’ll keep you weirdo’s updated on the book if you’re interested!

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